She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
my liver is dry heaving
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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