I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
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