So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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