yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
