his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I think people are normalizing furries
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
