dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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