Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
He uses pillows to masturbate.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Randomize
