so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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