brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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