it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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