"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
as a side note pls kill me
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