I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
