they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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