remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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