i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
