i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
