Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
