It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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