when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
You may now shotgun with the bride
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Randomize
