Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
