ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
