Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
