the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Drunk is not a location!
Randomize
