no. you can't hotbox the world.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Randomize
