Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(701): View more from North Dakota

i want to fuck

(320): View more from Minnesota

?

(701): View more from North Dakota

it's pretty self explanatory

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(304): View more from West Virginia

all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over

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(443): View more from Maryland

The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"

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(720): View more from Colorado

Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers

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(517): View more from Michigan

All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.

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(213): View more from California

there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.

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(706): View more from Georgia

In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.

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(210): View more from Texas

He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.

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(404): View more from Georgia

A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.

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