i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
