please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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