Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize