We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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