so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Randomize