Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
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