I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Randomize