Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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