She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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