Its about making memories worth repressing
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
