have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Houston, we have a squirter
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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