Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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