scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
