I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize