Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
