I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
