At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
