Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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