first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
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