we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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