we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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