I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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