I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
this hospital has no fireball
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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