i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
