I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
